One of the many things that I have learned since having a baby is how much work it takes to breastfeed. Before I became a mother, I got the impression that it was a fairly simple process that didn’t take much time or thought. Sure, it was common for ladies to have challenges at the beginning, but those issues didn’t last past the first several weeks, right? Wrong. Now that I have experienced it for myself, I am realizing that my perception of breastfeeding could not have been more wrong.
According to the CDC, approximately 83% of children are breastfed as newborns, but when babies reach three months old, that statistic drops to just under 50%. By one year of age, only 35% of babies are breastfed.
All I can say in response to those numbers is this: I get it. Breastfeeding is hard. Even for those who have a fairly smooth experience, it still takes a ton of time and energy. Even in the moments when you aren’t physically nursing, it still has to be on your mind. Is what you are putting into your mouth safe for your child? Are you getting enough vitamins and nutrients? Are you drinking enough water?
For me, one of the most difficult aspects of breastfeeding has been simply getting enough food. Gone are the days when I can eat lunch and not have to think about food until dinnertime. If I leave the house for more than an hour without a bottle of water and a sack of healthy snacks, my milk supply takes a direct hit…as does my ability to stay energized and alert.
Little Buddy has struggled with breastfeeding from day one. Our hospital provided wonderful lactation consultants free of charge when we delivered, and they still do, which is amazing. I could bore you with the details, but they have basically determined that he has a mind of his own. Sometimes he breastfeeds, and other times he doesn’t. It took many hours of tears (both his and mine) to figure out out, but we have finally settled into a good routine that includes a combination of nursing and pumping/bottle feeding.
And while it took a while to accept the fact that my baby wasn’t ever going to “nurse like a pro,” I have come to really enjoy the flexibility that comes with being able to pump. It lets me take advantage of my increased supply in the morning hours without feeling the burden of a lower supply in the evening. It allows us to “fill him up” before bed so he is able to sleep through the night. When we’re at Bible study, either of us can feed him while we both still participate in the conversation. Pumping on the go was a challenge at first, but it didn’t take long to get the hang of it.
I still nurse whenever Little Buddy will tolerate it (which is always at least once a day) because there are studies that say that the actual act of breastfeeding allows a woman’s body to interact with the baby’s saliva and thus create “customized” milk based on her baby’s needs. I also have a container of organic formula on hand for emergencies. We have used it a number of times, and it gives me comfort to know that we have three ways to feed Little Buddy.
Our baby is only five months old but is bigger than plenty of babies who are seven and eight months old, we have recently started to slowly introduce pureed baby food (and when I say slowly, I mean a few times a week), just to get him used to it. I plan to breastfeed until his first birthday.
Do you have any experience with breastfeeding? I would love to hear from you!
Anonymous
I had a difficult time nursing my first child. She just didn’t want to do the work required to eat. She wanted the milk to fall into her mouth. She would finally latch on and then fall asleep. After many tears and days of trying, I ended up bottle feeding her (of course, I had to find a bottle that didn’t require much work for her to get the milk out.) I was pleasantly surprised to find that nursing was much easier with my other two children. I nursed both of them until they were one.
Anonymous
Same for me! Baby fought breast. Literally.
Amy
My first child had great difficulty with breastfeeding (“latching on”), which was exacerbated by severe jaundice. I found it very upsetting, as I thought just like you that breastfeeding would come naturally. At about 2.5 weeks old, I was told she had a failure to thrive and needed to be supplemented with formula. I was devastated at first because I wanted her to have the full benefit of breast milk, but once I saw how well she “thrived” by adding formula, I was very happy.
My second child nursed great, but absolutely refused to take a bottle (pumped or formula). Then at 9 months she abruptly switched straight to a sipper cup and refused to nurse!
My third child also had severe jaundice so I alternated breast milk and bottles. I think I had to switch to formula in the bottles at some point instead of breast milk because, crazy as it sounds, the pediatrician thought maybe my first and third kids were “allergic” in some way to my breast milk. My memory is a bit fuzzy because I was so busy with three little kids and he was born 20 years ago today!
So, you’re not alone. Just like in pregnancy, no one has the same issues as all the other Mothers out there. Good luck!
Ellie
Happy birthday to your son! Ours also had some jaundice, which made eating more difficult. Hoping we don’t have to go through that again!
Ellie
Jennifer
As disappointing as it was, I did not produce any milk with either of my pregnancies. I had tests done to make sure all was healthy. They found no issue other than both my babies were C-section and preemies. I have never been able to get a clear answer if there is a connection. I had no choice but to bottle feed. I used organic soy with my boys. They are both healthy, happy, strong, and smart. I cried often in the beginning, but was thankful to have the formula option. Little Buddy is a cutie. Enjoy! I have 4 boys😄💙.
Ellie
It’s wonderful to have the availability of formula! I’ve always wondered what folks would have done in the old days in such situations. Cows milk, I suppose.
Laura
No, actually goat milk! Goat milk is the type of milk that’s more similar to mum’s milk, for babies.
I looked into it after I saw a movie about a prehistoric man whose mummy was found in the mountains in Europe. The story is very interesting, he’s called Otzi and he’s the only mummy ever found in ice – usually all mummies are made and found in very dry places, and the normal process of mummifying a body consists in drying it our of its liquids. But in his case the story was different and still unique: he died in the glaciers in the Alps and became a mummy while incorporated in ice.
But I’m digressing: they made a movie with the fictional reconstruction of his story and how he died, based on the conditions they found him in. In the movie, the prehistoric man at some point finds himself alone caring for a newborn baby, as the mother and the other people from his village are killed by enemies. He has a goat and to calm the baby, he attached him to the goat’s breast and the goat feeds him. I briefly looked into it and I think that there’s a scientific basis, goat milk should be good for babies. I’m not a doctor though, and I have to admit I didn’t research THAT far. I just found the whole story and all the details interesting!
Ellie
That’s very interesting! Thanks for sharing. 🙂
Have a wonderful Sunday,
Ellie
MarriedUK
Wet nursing was also a common solution.
Diana
Jennifer, that is my story also x3 children. It was a very hard time for me each time I realized that breastfeeding would not happen.
Ann
Yes, I am breastfeeding my daughter now. It was hard in the beginning! She latches on the tip, so it can get very painful at times. But breast milk is what’s best for her. She has a dairy intolerance, so I had to stop eating dairy. Being a working mom made it twice as hard. Have to pump at work in a closet. However whatever choice mother’s make for their babies is good.
Ellie
Good work, mama! That sounds difficult, especially the part about pumping in a closet.
OhioMama
I was able to breastfeed my oldest for 6 month before my supply dried up ( I do blame my work because they weren’t all that accommodating like they said they would be with my pumping schedule) but I was happy to get in 6 good months with him. If my baby boy now I am hoping to go further even to a year nursing him since I’m a stay-at-home mom now. He is only 9 days old but we are going good. I am lucky that both my boys picked up on it very quickly. It is definitely a challenge but oh so worth it.
Ellie
So sweet to have a 9-day-old! How are you feeling?
OhioMama
As crazy as it sounds I feel amazing. I don’t even feel like I gave birth. I’m sleep deprived as normal with any new parent but otherwise great. I felt ready to leave the hospital the next day but policy stated I had to stay 24hrs. This is completely different from when I had my 1st, idk if it’s because the epidural didn’t fully kick in this time or what but I’m happy I recovered quickly this time makes it so much easy keeping up with my hyper 3 year old boy.
Ellie
That’s great to hear! What does your 3-year-old think of the baby? It’s always fun to see how siblings respond.
Ellie
OhioMama
He absolutely loves him, he makes sure everyone knows that his baby brother is his baby. My husband and I talked to him about the new baby my whole pregnancy to really prepare him for it. He wants to help me so much with him. I feel the 3 year age difference helps to because he understands so much.
Ellie
That’s so sweet! Hoping our little guy is like that when we have another child.
OhioMama
It helps keeping them involved as much as possible. He came to all of my appointments with me, ultrasounds included, the only appointments he didn’t come too were my last few ones when they would check me for dilation.
Ellie
That’s a great idea to get him involved. I’m sure you are snapping lots of adorable photos of the two of them these days!
Elizabeth
I would say be gracious to yourself. My pride took a big hit when I realized I also wouldn’t be able to exclusively breastfeed my son, despite trying literally everything. It became an idol in my self. I read an article that really changed my heart and said “I can have all the milk in the world but if I have not love..” I think you are doing a great job!
Anon
I also had to exclusively pump after seeing 7 lactation consultants, having a tongue and lip tie revised, and a premature reflux baby..it was an extremely challenging time.
Kudos for sticking with it! I was determined to get to a year as well. I pumped exclusively for 6 months but once we added in solids I felt like I spent no time with my son. I was pumping and then feeding him and then washing everything and then feeding him solids. And then he wanted to crawl around when I was pumping. Anyway after 6 months he got formula, solid food and a bottle or two of breast milk a day. Near the end of the year, (around 9 months) I had enough frozen breast milk milk to last me a bottle a day til he was a year and stopped pumping then. Around 6 months I started freezing milk and slowly introducing formula in lieu of those bottles, which is how I got a little stash built up.
sarah
It was hard! Mostly because my son had a tongue tie, a slightly recessed jaw and “clamp down bite” and I over produced in the beginning. I worked with his pediatrician and a lactation specialist and they both helped but I was still in such excruciating pain that by three months I decided I would just pump and feed him with bottles. I had everything sterilized and ready to go and then, in that moment, I felt the holy spirit whisper to me not to do it. Lol, that was unexpected, and I was disappointed. But I wanted to follow that promoting, so I did. Things got a lot less painful soon after that and we got into a good routine. I was able to nurse him until he was almost two! I was grateful I could do it and grateful for the ways that I saw that it benefited my son. I will try my best to do it again if we have another. I know so many women love nursing but for me, well, I was thrilled when it was over.
darlene
thank you for your honest appraisal!
i never had the chance to breastfeed my first son so when my second one came along, i was gung-ho! unfortunately i couldn’t get him to latch on and the poor kid was starving! it was very frustrating and humiliating (and i felt so pressured) because this was supposed to be the most natural thing in the world and i couldn’t provide for my child! at first we thought it was because he was premature that he wouldn’t latch on so the hospital had the lactation consultants work with me and they finally suggested expressing and that’s what i ended up having to do with each of them. (apparently i have ‘flat nipples’) in fact, when my milk wasn’t coming in all that great, we added formula. i felt like such a failure but i realized that if all i did was breastfeed, my husband never would have been able to have those bonding moments over feedings that he did. especially now that he’s gone, i relish those memories of him getting up, telling me to go back to sleep, bring baby to the rocking chair and enjoying special one-on-one time with each of them
Momoftwins
Oh, the joys! My first one also was tough to breastfeed and had fairly bad jaundice. After about two weeks of fighting breastfeeding issues, I gave up, which was very sad for me. I felt guilty and wondered if I would ever be to breastfeed! But, like has been said, thank goodness for formula! He has always been healthy and is one smart kiddo! Then along came the second one with a much more laid back personality and he nursed like a pro. I nursed him for 9 months. I went on to successfully nurse two more and then we had our surprise!! twins. And I actually was able to nurse them for 4 months with very little supplementing. ( I totally know what you are saying though, about always thinking about what you should eat or drink. It was FOR SURE that way with the twins. Lots of oatmeal and Mother’s Milk tea) So, just because the first one doesn’t work so well, don’t think it will go that way with the rest. Don’t be too hard on yourself as a first time mom! 😊
Jessica
I have two daughters and two very different experiences. With my first I wasn’t producing enough milk, so we had to introduce formula and combine it with breastfeeding when she was two weeks old. At two months, we had switched to formula only, as my milk supply ran out completely. With my youngest I had more than enough, and she was breastfed until she was almost two years old. I’m kind of sad that I couldn’t breastfeed my oldest any longer than I did, but I just wasn’t able to.
Becki
I understand your obstacles, Ellie! My first child had trouble and was never able to latch on and it took 5 days for the milk to come in. We had to supplement formula and I pumped exclusively for him for a full year so he could have breastmilk. It was very taxing especially since I am a full time career mom but worth it to me. I can still remember all the pain! The second child latched the day she was born and I produced that same day. The midwife said I was seasoned! I had much more milk. I breastfed her as much as possible but also pumped since she had to go to daycare at 6 months. I breastfed her until she was about 14 months. I loved being able to do that for my children but it was a good feeling getting my body and freedom (from producing milk) back. I read alot of books while pumping and breastfeeding to pass the time! Good luck!!
Lauren
Thank you so much for this “real” post! I think as mothers, we out so much pressure on ourselves to do the right thing. And if it doesn’t work out, we feel like we have failed.
I wasn’t able to breastfeed either of my babies – letdown was too forceful and the ended up choking on milk! Instead, I exclusively pumped for 9 months with both. By that time, I had enough milk frozen to last till they were 12 months old. The logistics and effort it took to do this was insane and I didn’t sleep through the night when they did because I would get extra pumping sessions in for my freezer stash. But it was so worth it!
Anonymous
Way too much information in this post! Some stuff should just stay private and not be posted on the Internet.
Anonymous
This is the kind of information Mother’s need to share with each other! And no matter if you breastfeed, pump or formula feed, fed is best!
Anonymous
This is an interesting opinion, but I don’t see anything wrong with Ellie sharing struggles with her baby eating. I am unsure why feeding a baby is too much information. All living things need to eat. Do you think puppies or kittens feeding is inappropriate? How about calves drinking milk on a farm? Same thing :).
Having said that, you may find other blogs more appropriate for your beliefs.
Anonymous
Then why are you reading a post on breastfeeding knowing full well what would be discussed?
Lauren
There’s nothing inappropriate about these posts. Breasts were made for breastfeeding. Perhaps in the future steer clear of reading posts that are clearly labelled “breastfeeding.” The more information moms/women share, the better.
Anne
There is a TON of information about people’s breastfeeding experiences on the internet. I’m thankful there is because when you’re in the middle of a problem it’s awesome to see that someone else has been through the same thing and find solutions and community!
Anonymous
Some people are typically ragging on Ellie’s blog. However, the internet in general probably has thousands of other sources of information on this same topic. It is not only in her blog. Also this is just to be expected in this category of blog. When new moms get together with people one can imagine that sharing experiences becomes inevitable. Then some people thinking too much information is inevitable too.
Anonymous
Disagree anon 6/9/19 @8:37 am, many moms struggle and think they are alone. Thank you Ellie for your honesty! I also thought it would be fairly easy, my daughter had a mind of her own! I pumped for a little over 10 months then lost supply, good luck!
Diana
I completely disagree with you. Women do not get enough support on this topic and it is a very tough road to travel. Ellie is a talented writer who clearly cares about her readers by bringing topics that matter to the forefront. From magic erasers to breastfeeding! Keep it up, Ellie!
Anon
Hi! I’m one of the “anonymous” users with a different life path and I get it. Breastfeeding can be super tough. I was pumping when I went back to work, breastfeeding, suppling bottles to daycare, washing bottles, rinse repeat. You are definitely in a tough time now – when the babies really have appetites and it is very hard to keep up production, even if you are at home full time. This will pass. It did feel easier once they were able to get solid food in addition to milk. This came for us just when I was losing the drive to keep going. I still nursed my last baby well past 2 at bedtime (of course she was eating full meals by then). With that said, she’s now almost 4 (so not that long ago that I weaned), and it’s a distant memory. I share this to give you hope – even though times are tough and it’s a constant thing on your mind to eat enough, and worrying, it will all be a distant memory one day (because soon enough, you’ll be worrying about potty training haha).
I say this not only with breast feeding, but with any path that works best for moms. Some do formula off the bat, some add formula at 6 weeks – whatever the case, there will be so many struggles and worries in the early months and it feels so overwhelming.
Joke Vermanen
Don’t say you know how breastfeeding works… until you do.
And then comes the second child….. you can start all over again!
I am now pregnant with our 4th child and can’t wait to start, but I’ve had the hard times, the pain, the struggle, the pumping to hold things up, the leaking.
Our youngest 2 were with me every evening until they were about 6 months old. So, no evenings away for me. But I loved every second of it! And am going to do it again once more.
Anonymous
This was interesting to read, Ellie. I had three babies in three years and nursed them all well into toddlerhood. It is easy to forget that my personal experience is not that of all mothers. For me, it was easy and all three kids took to it right away. I nursed until they were ready for sippy cups and never used a bottle. I probably nursed my youngest a bit longer that I should have just because she was the last. They are now 29, 30, and 31.
Susan
Thanks for your honest breastfeeding post! It can be a wonderfull experience, but also very challenging. My first was a pro at breastfeeding, but I found it very challenging to be ‘available’ at all time for my newborn. She suffered from acid reflux, cried a lot and wanted to nurse a LOT, but after 3 months it finally got easier. And then she refused, and I was tired of it all and stopped at around 3.5 months.
My second child had problems to latch on, was losing too much weight so I was pumping and bottle feeding. But with a newborn and a 1,5yo to take care of, it was exhausting me. I stopped when he was 5 weeks old. A hard decision, but it was best for us.
Regina Shea
I had issues with nursing my babies because they weren’t getting enough milk. I used a SNS ( Supplemental Nursing System) but it was always difficult to get it ready. By the time I had it all put together and around my neck baby was so upset at me for taking so long I was given the evil eye!
Anon
I had the same thoughts before children, that breastfeeding would just “work” pretty easily and the same realization of how hard it can be after my 1st was born! I had the opposite problem of an oversupply, which caused numerous bouts of mastitis, clogged ducts, too forceful letdown, engorgement to where he couldn’t latch… it was a “good” problem to have but still made for a painful experience, for 6+ months. I once pumped 11 oz from 1 side at 1 time! At 8.5 months he started biting me (with teeth) and wouldn’t stop and I couldn’t take the pain anymore. Fed him with frozen breastmilk for 2 solid months because I had so much! With my 2nd child, things went better, I learned not to pump too much to overstimulate my supply, and she nursed for 13.5 months, refusing to ever take a bottle that whole time.
Benita
My daughter refused to nurse, but when she was 3 mos old, she refused the bottle and wanted to nurse. I worried that I wouldn’t have any milk, but things turned out fine for a bit. she only nursed for about 3 mos and refused the breast again. I guess her system needed some antibodies; I really don’t know.
Anonymous
Your posts are always so sweet and I think probably a big help to other young moms who may be struggling through the same things. Some babies nurse very easily and some have a harder time despite everything that you could possibly try. You’re doing an amazing job💗 If Little Handsome has a doctors visit anytime soon, you could ask them to check to see if he has a tongue or lip tie (if that hasn’t been checked already), as those can make it harder for a baby to nurse, and can be simply corrected.
MarriedUK
Breastfeeding is so tricky because we’ve all heard how important it is and how much “better” it is for our babies but there isn’t enough support/ research. I had an awful time feeding #1 (managed to mix feed for 8 months) and it took everything I had to keep at it… and so much pumping. Urgh- it was so hard. But #2 did the famous “breast crawl” (google it if you haven’t heard of it) and latched on like a dream. He fed for two years and it was a wonderful experience. By the time I had #3, I was a pro and we managed nicely. #3 is now 13 months and I will be sad to stop; he’s my last bubba and the last time I nurse him will be the last time I nurse.
I am in awe of people who exclusively/ almost exclusively pump. It is such an amazing commitment to your child. Little Buddy is a lucky boy.
Anonymous
Umm, there is TONS of research that supports breastfeeding being better for your baby (obviously it is more important that your baby is fed in general, whether that’s with breast milk or with formula, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that breast milk is healthier for your baby)
MarriedUK
I am a massive fan of breast feeding and am aware of the research that does exist*. What I was referring to above was research about how to problem bust/support people. However, it’s always worth bearing in mind the pain of those who didn’t manage to nurse and for that reason it isn’t kind to extol it’s benefits.
*research showing long term benefits is actually quite limited, once social class is controlled for. But that isn’t surprising- who had the money to research breast milk? Formula companies- who don’t exactly have an interest in showing its superiority.
Anonymous
MarriUK, ok I see what you were saying. And yes, I personally believe that breast feeding is more about the short term benefits it has for your baby, not necessarily that it changes anything about your adult or adolescent health, other than boosting a baby’s immune, which could help in the long run. It would definitely be nice for there to be more research done though.
Jessica
Breastfeeding is hard work. I have breastfed non stop for almost 9 years now. I have six children and I have nursed all of them until their sibling was born. I have even nursed with a newborn and toddler. But that’s really painful. I got mastitis a day later and ended up in the ER with a newborn. That was just a few months ago.
I’ve nursed through every pregnancy. I’ve just had to eat more for the growing baby and the baby I was nursing. So, it’s definitely possible. My first was a preemie so nursing wasn’t easy. But I was determined to make it work. And it did. I know how painful it can be but it’s not supposed to be. I’ve had to keep on nursing even when I didn’t know if I could. The longest I’ve nursed one child is to 2 years and 1 month. My other children are closer in age. It’s all worth it though.
There’s nothing like that bond. It’s so sweet. I don’t pump or anything so I’ve learned to nurse the baby and do other things too. But also to enjoy our time bonding.
AmyRyb
With my first I had a very hard time at the beginning with supply, made even worse by my baby being at the hospital for an extra week. I freaked out one night about it, did some research about supplementing, and decided that I just wanted him fed! After that I pretty much exclusively breastfed until he started daycare at seven weeks, at which point I knew my pumped milk wouldn’t be enough and had to supplement with a bottle or two of formula per day. We made that system work for months! I think I had one clogged duct but otherwise things went OK. I think I stopped pumping at work around a year, and then we whittled down to morning and night feedings and then just night. A little after 14 months I decided it was time and we did one last bedtime feeding and that was it! With my second I had the same plan (minus the formula in the hospital–no need for that this time around), but by five weeks it was apparent that he was reacting to the cow’s milk protein in my milk and it was either give up dairy or stop breastfeeding. I tried for a week to give up dairy, but it just wasn’t working for my family–I had trouble coming up with things everyone would eat, and the substitutions weren’t ideal–so I gave it up. I felt terrible about it until I realized that my mental health was important, too! I didn’t enjoy taking on the expense of his very pricey formula (Nutramigen) but he did great on it and I actually enjoyed the flexibility of not having to worry about engorgement or nursing in front of my other son, or being able to easily have my husband feed the baby. It worked out well for us the second time around. I often wonder what I would have done with a third if we chose to go that route!
Stephanie
I breastfed both of my daughters for 13 months, and it for sure puts the “labor” in labor of love! Breastfeeding hunger is no joke. You are still sustaining human life with your body, only it’s not a passive process like during pregnancy! I struggled a lot with clogged ducts with my first, especially after I returned to work and began pumping. I had no idea what I was doing! Things were much smoother with my second, but clogged ducts were still the bane of my existence. I’ve had mastitis three times, and that was always an unpleasant experience. A year of nursing after 9 months of pregnancy can feel like such a long time. But I encourage you to continue to work towards your goal as long as it is working for both you and Little Buddy. I’m getting ready to do it again for baby #3 in October, and I’m already looking forward to October 2020 when I can start weaning!
Anne
I was sore at the beginning but thankfully didn’t experience any cracks, bleeding or mastitis that I was assured I would encounter at some point. It did drain me physically though and I was ALWAYS HUNGRY. Baby girl had a high arch in her mouth and wouldn’t work to latch deep enough to start sucking so I had to use a nipple shield for the first 5 months. That thing was a lifesaver!! We managed to go for a year (and I pumped two days a week at work) and it did get easier at 6 months and at 9 months. She really didn’t seem to care that we stopped! Just wanted her milk didn’t care how she got it! It was a nice experience but I’m glad it’s over ha!
Lydia
My first baby latched and nursed well and seemed to enjoy eating immensely. Nursing was incredibly painful at first, but I didn’t have supply issues. I stayed home and rested with him, kept him close to me and fed him on demand. I know that helped with my supply. He nursed until around 13 months. He was the chubbiest baby I have ever seen, but you wouldn’t believe how fast those chubbies melted away when he got really mobile! Enjoy this time with your son.
My second child was a very fussy nurser and would unlatch and cry when my milk let down, refusing to re-latch until the milk was no longer letting down forcefully. I learned to have a rag at the ready to catch the let down until she was ready to re-latch. Unlike my first child, she did not care much for comfort nursing and self weaned very much to my surprise at 9 months. No painful nursing that time, but those first few months were hard.
My third child latched immediately after being born. He enjoyed eating also and still does! By far my easiest baby. Weaned easily around a year too…didn’t have to push him; he loved that solid food and got less and less interested in nursing.
My fourth child is 3 months old and a good nurser now. I wish I had tried harder with the bottle around the 6 week mark but she hates drinking from a bottle. I hope to warm her up to the idea soon so she can go delight Grandma. When she was a newborn, she was an extremely lethargic nurser (no meds in her system either; I’ve had all home births). I had to pester her constantly, tickling her feet and legs, to get her to wake up and eat. She soon worked up an appetite and is now chubby just like her siblings were but has been the only one of my babies to be that sleepy during nursing.
All babies are different. All moms are different. I would encourage any moms out there who are struggling with breastfeeding and wanting to continue to — do not give up! Nursing is really hard work. We want things to be easy in life, but sometimes they aren’t. Your body needs a lot more sleep, food, and fluid when you’re nursing. Nourish your body with the best food you can afford. Keep your baby close and nurse on demand. Remember that nursing is supply and demand. Don’t be afraid to say “No” to outside commitments if those are stressing you out and feeling like too much. You cannot do everything; you have to prioritize what is most important to YOU. Our culture really doesn’t honor the specialized needs of nursing moms and their unique challenges. Don’t be afraid to speak up regarding you and your baby’s needs.
And then there are moms who can’t nurse for a legitimate physical/medical condition. If you are one of these moms, know that it is not your fault. God will provide. I would encourage those in this situation to check out Sally Fallon’s books Nourishing Traditions and The Nourishing Traditions Book of Baby and Child Care. For those interested, there ARE alternatives to commercial formula that traditional cultures have been using with great success long before commercial formula.
Ellyn
I love your second to last paragraph – really good things to keep in mind 🙂 For me too, as I am currently struggling with breastfeeding my 2 week old.
E
Good for you Ellie. Breastfeeding can be very hard and many moms can benefit from your honesty. I breastfed my first born no problem and then my second was born with a severe cleft palate and could not breastfeed. It was so devastating to not be able to provide for my second the way I had my first. I pumped until my supply ran out (about 6 months) but that was so so hard. Please don’t put too much pressure on yourself to keep pumping, it’s really tough. Formula is ok! You’re doing a great job!
Eileen
I enjoyed your blog on breastfeeding Ellie and all the comments from young moms. It is really heartening to read about moms’ experiences and encouraging others who may not be able to breast feed. We all try to do the very best for our babies and it is so easy to feel we are failing when something like breast feeding does not work out the way we would want it to. It is great to read informative and supportive comment. My breast feeding experiences were long ago and at that time not lots of support. With our first child, I wanted to pump because I went back to work when our daughter was only 2 months – what a heartbreak for me- (I left work when she was 6 months) and we had to travel to another city 3 hours away to the only store selling breast pumps and they were manual and a couple of hundred dollars at that time. I breast fed or bottle fed breastmilk for the first year with all our kids and never went to work again that early. Maternity leave was much shorter time frames then and it made breastfeeding so much more difficult to sustain. I am so glad that there are changes as well as much longer maternity terms as well as far more information regarding the early years of a child’s life and the bonding factors etc with parents. Even if you are not breast feeding the bonding for a parent with their baby during feeding times is so important.
Anonymous
Nursing my first was the hardest, it took me a week to figure out laying down to nurse worked best until he was a little older. I have nursed all three of my kids into toddlerhood, they just all loved the snuggle and comfort. I’m pregnant with baby 4 and still nursing my 3rd twice a day.
Good job figuring out what worked for you Ellie and not giving up! Have you heard of lactation cookies? If you search for them you will find TONS of recipes that are supposed to help with milk supply, I know eating oats make a big difference for me.
Ellie
Thanks for sharing! And thanks for sending the link to the recipe. I tried lactation cookies once, but I haven’t made them in a while. Need to get back at that, so thanks for the reminder!
Ellie
MarriedUK
There’s nothing wrong with having a cookie but there is no evidence that lactation cookies have any effect at all.
Anonymous
These are the best lactation cookies: https://www.howsweeteats.com/2015/02/lactation-cookies/
Anonymous
Breastfeeding was not a good fit for my babies and me. I preferred to bottle feed my kiddos and once I made that decision, things got a lot smoother at home. I was criticized almost everywhere I went but now my kids are older, happy, healthy, and thriving so it really doesn’t matter how the kids are fed as long as mom is happy.
Ellyn
I love reading through these comments because I am currently struggling with breastfeeding my 2 week old son. My supply seems OK, but I’ve been exclusively pumping because he falls asleep at the breast, and I’m also having a lot of pain feeding him even when making sure his latch is OK. It’s very tempting to switch to formula, but I am trying to stick it out. It is truly hard work!