The other day, I was thinking back on Little Buddy’s birth and looking at his newborn photos. (I’m not sure why people claim that you forget the pain immediately after delivery because I certainly haven’t, and it’s been over a year. That’s not to say that I don’t want more children. I definitely do. But I can still recall the awfulness of the contractions and how quickly they came on, with very little rest in between, after having my water broken.)
I’m wondering if anyone else experienced brain fog during and after labor? Mine started several hours after I was induced. At that point, I hadn’t eaten anything for a good 12 hours, per hospital policy. The brain fog continued until about a week postpartum. It didn’t affect me as much during the day, as long as I didn’t attempt to do anything that required a lot of brain power,. But in the evenings, I was incredibly overwhelmed and ended up in tears multiple times. I was so grateful to have help from my mom during the day and Mr. Handsome in the evenings. A postpartum woman should not be left alone until the baby is at least a week old, in my opinion.
I’m not sure if the brain fog it was due to the Pitocin given during my induction, or the exhaustion, or the 30 hours without food, or maybe a combination of all those factors. Unfortunately, all of those factors were completely unavoidable. I’m just curious if anyone else had the same thing happen?
Mim
If you have a peaceful birth the high you get from birthing a baby outweighs the pain. With my third child I had a birth that made me want to have another baby! Then with my fourth I had a traumatic pregnancy and then not an awful hospital birth but not one with fuzzy feelings either. Now with number 5 I am hoping for a calm experience with a midwife but I haven’t had her before so I don’t know. If you want a calm birthing experience get a midwife that you LOVE! It is π― percent worth it and will totally change the way you feel about birthing and pregnancy. Midwives will let you eat all the time you are in labor. Can’t have a baby with a weak Mama!
Anonymous
This reminds me of something I read (and I thought I already sent about this to you). But I’ll just mention it vaguely now since I’ve not got that link. The thing is research, somewhere, says that the mother actually
has something physically happen in her brain when having a baby. So that she has to rewire and rebuild her brain all over, as a mother. Maybe this is like the teacher using the chalk board all morning. Then has a few children wipe everything off. Thus its a clean slate ready for a new use in the afternoon, when it gets rewritten on. That’s just a kind of metaphor. I did not invent this theory, as I said, there’s stuff about this online and research about it out there. Your testimony suggests the theory may have some substance. You actually had to become a brand new mom from the inside out and the more sophisticated, more educated you, was somehow ‘wiped away’ to do this. May be….
Regina
All my births were c-section but I did have brain fog too. Since I had c-sections I couldn’t have food but after the birth, I had to eat a clear liquid diet until I ahem, pass gas. To this day I don’t eat jello!
I remember in the hospital I did cry over silly things and when I came home. I’m sure it was due to my body trying to adjust to producing milk, hormones adjusting to not having a baby growing and just the emotions of being a mother and being trusted to take care of a new little person.
Anonymous
I had postpartum and I was left home along with a baby. And nothing happen.
AmyRyb
My first spent a week in the special care nursery as he received antibiotics for some fluid in his lungs. I thought I was doing OK until I had a major breakdown mid-week. I realized after the fact that I wasn’t properly resting because I was spending my days in a tiny room adjacent to the nursery, and it didn’t really lend itself to daytime naps. Between hormones, breastfeeding, long days at the hospital, and worry over my son, in retrospect I was a total mess. The whole body is impacted by birth and with the adjustment to less sleep and a rush of hormones, it’s no wonder it’s hard to function.
Ellie
That sounds rough. I agree that the time spent in the hospital after giving birth is a complete blur. And even though you are exhausted, there are so many other things to take care of that sleep doesn’t always happen.
Anonymous
I had one natural birth, the 1st and 3 c-sections. The pain from the last c-section was the WORST.The natural birth wasn’t so bad-just 6 hrs, but the baby blues were awful. I recovered quickly from the 1st c-section, but went downhill after the next 2.
Ellie
I’m curious about the pain. Was it recovery pain or pain during and immediately after the C-section?
Ellie
Netta
I would not say that I have experienced brain fog in or after labour. But I have had some kind of baby blues with both our second and third child. Nothing too serious, but a few days after giving birth I was very emotional and tears came easily and thoughts of why on earth we decided to welcome another child were highly present. I do think this is normal. With our first child we had a rough start with him catching an infection and ending up in our equivalence to your NICU. He had to have antibiotics IV. In addition I was in pain due to having had a quite big rupture. I was crying a lot and although I could understand with my head that he would be okay, at that point it FELT like he was dying. Not too rational. No brain fog though. I have had very quick deliveries, ranging from 3,5 – 1,5 h, which I think has helped me stay clear. I do not recognise being super tired after giving birth. When Iβve seen pictures of the duchess of Cambridge outside the hospital only shortly after giving birth, all smiley, Iβve said it could have been me (although Iβm as pretty as she). But I couldnβt have done the same a week later. During the years when the kids were small I was quite exhausted at times due to lack of sleep. There are advantages of having older kids, sleeping well is one of them.
Ellie
Thanks for sharing your experiences, Netta. And I’m sure you are every bit as beautiful as the duchess of Cambridge. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. π
Ellie
Nicole
I’m pretty sure it’s the hormone crash that causes the brain fog, the tears, and exhaustion. After you have the baby your hormone levels change so rapidly it causes all kinds of side effects. I also had unexplained crying, but also night sweats, and lost huge chunks of hair, among other things.
Ellie
That makes a lot of sense! I also had hair loss. Glad that’s over now…LOL
Marilyn
Ellie, wishing you a day of happiness and a year of blessings. God Bless.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Joan,Marion and Marilyn
Ellie
Thank you, ladies! π
MJ
It took me a long time to forget the pain of childbirth too. I had 2-3 days of back labor which progressed slowly, then I had prolonged second stage, and a forceps delivery. I had a few postpartum issues due to the long labor and delivery, but nothing serious. For a while we considered not having any more children. I felt I couldnβt go through that again. Four years later I got my courage back and had my son. Labor, delivery, and recovery were much shorter this time. Even though my son and daughter are 4 years apart in age, they always had a good relationship and still do. They are now ages 33 and 29.
Ellie
Thank you for sharing, MJ. It’s always good to hear of siblings that have a good relationship even when they are a few years apart in age.
Ellie
Ellyn
I get brain fog pretty badly when I don’t eat. I know this is terrible, but I snuck in a few light snacks during both of my labors when the nurses weren’t looking. Bad, but I felt like I would pass out if I hadn’t. I don’t know if I’d call what I felt after giving birth brain fog; whatever it was, it was a very deep exhaustion you don’t really feel unless you give birth. For me the sleep deprivation after giving birth definitely messed with my mind. How could it not? Sleep deprivation can be used as a form of torture. My son just turned 10 months and I feel like I’m very slowly (still) recovering from pretty severe sleep deprivation. I’m still not myself -but getting there.
Ellie
Hang in there, Ellyn! I didn’t start feeling like myself until the one-year mark, so things should definitely be on the upswing. π
Ellie
Ellyn
Aw thanks Ellie π
M
I would say that the crying part is totally normal. Compared to a lot of stories, I have had very easy births and was fine right after, but two months later have been very low with both. I think the foggy brain part for you had to do with the long birth etc. And the fear of pain… With my first I didn’t have more than about 3-4 “hard” hours, but I remembered them very well. When my second one was due 16 months later, I spent the whole pregnancy praying and working with my fear. God allowed me the blessing of a short, easy birth less than an hour after arriving at the hospital, and after that I really think I forgot the pain, and look forward to the third without fear (though I know it could be harder again.)
I can’t promise you anything, but usually the second labor is easier than the first. And though you had to go through that all the first time, I hope you get a better experience next time. Children are such a blessing!
Ellie
Thank you for the encouragement! And that is wonderful to hear that you prayed and worked on your fear. Such an important step for all of us Christians to take when we experience fear of any kind. Blessings!
Ellie
MS
My bad brain fog was with my first. I had 32 hours of labor- got my epidural after 19 bad hours of back labor- I had planned a natural birth but it was horrible. Afterwards I was so puffy-couldn’t fit into my shoes to go home even though I was great during the pregnancy. It was a bad experience and I couldn’t think straight. My other two were natural labor and much better. I did not like the epidural experience though I felt like I did the right thing for my child and me at the time. My son had swallowed meconium (he had gone into distress a bit from the difficult labor) and was born grunty but was quickly ok. My other birth experiences were better – about half as fast each time and much better. I also tried to stay forward to prevent my babies from going into my back as my first was in a posterior position (head down but backwards) and must have turned right before coming. It gets better.
Ellie
I’m so glad to hear that your second and third births were easier than the first. That gives me hope π
Ellie
OhioMama
My second birth was by far better recovery then my 1st. With my 1st I had to have stitches with my second nothing I actually coughed him out and no I’m not joking. Less than week after I had my second I had people asking how I was feeling, my response every time was I didn’t feel like I just given birth. With my 1st the recovery wasn’t horrible but it was rough from the stitches, I actually had a lady get mad at me cause I wasn’t walking fast enough for her at a consignment sale for children clothes and I turned around a ripped her a new one, she turned around and went a different way. That being a few days after I got out of the hospital, so I was tired and still getting use to mother hood and trying to get use to nursing for the 1st time. My husband and are not sure if we want to have another child yet, I am on the fence I would love to but I don’t want all the medical bills again. It’s easy to forget the pain and everything after a while, though for me I forgot everything once I got to hold my baby for the first time
Leah
Oh yes, every birth is different and you may very well have a much better experience the second time. I had a long but good labor with my first, but her heart and breathing stopped shortly after she was born. She had to be resuscitated right next to me. She was and is just fine, but I was so scared when I was pregnant again, especially since no cause for my daughter’s issues was found. I talked with a therapist a few times to help get ready to have my second and it was so helpful. I recommend that to anyone who had a rough birth and is struggling. Anyways, my second delivery was perfect and I ended up with another fabulous daughter. For the next time, you’ll have a better idea of what conversations to have with your healthcare provider. When I told mine how anxious I was, she arranged to have a NICU doctor attend my delivery so help could be given immediately if needed. That really put me at ease and helped me relax and bring my baby into the world.
Ellie
That sounds very scary! So glad you had a better experience the second time around. Thanks for sharing, Leah. Have a wonderful day.
Ellie
Anonymous
My first delivery was awful. I was in labor for 21 hours, and I pushed for over two hours. They finally delivered my son with an episiotomy and the use of forceps. There was a lot of tearing and stitches. It’s not true that women forget the pain of childbirth. I know I didn’t, and that’s why there’s 16 years between my children. Yes, my second labor and delivery were much easier for my daughter. Although I had to have her in a foreign country with a doctor and a hospital that I’d never seen or been to before. However, I had severe late postpartum hemorrhaging when my daughter was 19 days old. I bled out for four hours at home, so I had to go back to the hospital and get four units of blood. After that experience and my previous birth experience I realized that I was done having children. In my opinion, you never forget the pain of childbirth or the physical damages that giving birth can cause to your body.
Ellie
I feel for you! That sounds very traumatic. π Whats the family dynamic like with 16 years between your kids? How did your oldest react when your youngest was born?
Ellie
Anonymous
How many more children do you think you want?
Ellie
We’re just taking it one at a time, but both of us would really like to have at least 4, Lord willing.
Ellie
Veronika
We have one child so far, that is about Little Buddys age. All of my life I have been terrified of labor. When I finally was pregnant my plan was to still try to have a natural delivery. Then, a few weeks before the due date it turned our that the baby was breech and would probably not turn around anymore. So I was scheduled a c-section which was a great relief. It didn’t turn out to be such a bad experience, of course I was in pain for a few days after delivery bur I never screamed or thought I was going to die (like many women tell about their natural deliveries). I’ve been thinking a lot wheter I would try to deliver naturally next time or chose a scheduled c-section from the beginning but the more birth stories I hear or read the more likely I will probaby go for another c-section ;-).
As for the brain fog, I don’t think I experienced anything like that but definitely some baby blues during the first weeks. And I agree with you, a woman should not be alone during that first time.
Ellie
I’m so glad your C-section was a good experience. I used to be terrified of the possibility of a C-section, but hearing good stories helps put me at ease. If you change your mind and want to attempt a vaginal delivery, I think you would find an epidural to make things very smooth. Some women get their epidural at the start of the pain, and that’s totally okay! And then if you did feel like it was too much and you wanted to go for the C-section, it would be a smooth transition, with the epidural already placed. Just something to think about. π
Ellie
Justine
Dear Ellie!!
I think U had brain fog, cause of lack of food, and being able to eat something!!!! I love U 3!!!!!
Connie Dean
Beautiful baby. I have ex cancer done with chemo Feb 9 but still check cancer every 3 months. I done with blood clot and blood thinner shot April 22. One more left is brain anysterm. Let Bates and Rutgers to pray for me and you to. I only have 1 daughter she 22 will be 23 years old. My 2nd is miscarriage Sept 24-28 lost it. Should born MY 22 2000. I have pelvis mass and hysterectomy 21 pound I cry can’t have no more kids. But I have first granddaughter is 8 months. I still have 2 card from Bates. Anyone in family you , Bates or Duggars or whoever welcome send me get well. I love collection God Jesus Holy Spirit on wall or candle etc. I not mind share prayer for me. I love your baby Elle and many others.
Ellie
So sorry to hear that, Connie! We will definitely be praying for you, as well as for your daughter and granddaughter. That sounds like a very difficult situation.
Ellie